....

Does anyone else get the feeling that they just want to hide away from everyone, or sit down and just cry your heart out because everything looks insurmountable.  I want to do both.  Been to see my nutty nurse as I call her today, she's actually a cognitive behaviour therapist but has said today that it doesn't seem to be getting us anywhere apart from making me cry, so she's having a word with a psychologist instead.  I wish there was something that could be done for me, someone wave a magic wand and make me a nice person, someone that family can love, it was my birthday yesterday and although I wasn't expecting anything else no card or well wishes from either mum or step dad, dad or step mum, sister or brother and it hurts like hell.  I can understand they believe I'm a horrible person and want nothing to do with me but it still feels like someone's battered the living daylights out of me.  


On a brighter note I did get cards and love from my nan and grandad, without them I don't know what I'd do, OH, OHs nan and grandad, OHs mum and sister and brother, people at work and my lovely two children.